Please excuse if this is hard to understand I’m just on my mobile.
I have had an interesting ongoing experience recently which has left me with questions.
I had surgery 25th march and had post surgery complications. The pain has often been unbearable, and I can’t take most pain medications because they cause other problems.
Anyway, I was at my parents house one day lying in bed and on the wall is a framed picture of Jesus with some kids. I don’t believe in pictures depicting Jesus, but that picture started my experience.
So, anyway that night back at my own place I started talking to Jesus (I usually pray to the Father). It was the most amazing conversation. Jesus helped me through that particular pain (one of many), and removed it completely, all the while telling me things. I wanted to know why he hadn’t been there for me, and he assured me he had been – he was working through family who were helping in any way they could (only some family were, others couldn’t care less). He pointed out he works through anyone who is his, and those who didn’t care or help weren’t his. I hadn’t realised one son (now 22) who had been really supportive in his own way was (a Christian). Jesus assured me he had known him since he was only small and reminded me of some of the things he used to say, just goes to show, you never know who are his because this particular son never speaks about belief, and no one would guess.
Anyway, every day I have continued talking with Jesus. And Jesus has continued helping me through each pain. Some days are worse than others, but it only gets better. I cry when I think how much like us Jesus is. Jesus suffered all by himself. I cry when I see any human suffering (especially a documentary i saw on a concentration camp – why so much evil, how can people do those things to other human beings?). This is the same spirit i began with that i lost. I can see who are his and who aren’t so easily now. I cry when I think how much I love Jesus.
But it leaves me now wondering – is Jesus God? I know most here will say ‘no’ and so would I have months ago. But there’s only one God right? I am only seeing Jesus atm (with my heart mind and soul).
